Both sides of Congress have now passed the $800 billion bailout bill. The President will sign it soon.

Can you form a sentence that shows you understand these two new vocabulary words? Sarah Palin can.

Two vocabulary words for you today: oxymoron and maverick. Oxymoron: a combination of contradictory words Maverick: an independent individual who does not go along with a group Can you form a sentence that shows you understand these two new vocabulary words? Sarah Palin can: She is part of a team of mavericks.

Christians are demanding that NY schools stop teaching yoga because standing in a particular position forces children to be Hindus. In related news, Hindus want to ban football players from kneeling.

Sen. Thompson thinks Palin should have been given a list of Supreme Court cases because non-lawyers are not allowed to know about the Supreme Court. But they can criticize Roe v. Wade.

Nine states claim that the Bush administration is not enforcing the law because a recent ruling would allow some ships to discharge polluted ballast into clean drinking water.

A statute of a Hopi cultural symbol has been in front of the Edge of the Cedars State Park for 19 years. Harold Lyman was recently intimidated by the penis on the statute and complained.

Coca-Cola douches do not work. Expensive placebos work better than cheap ones. Men like to give money to ovulating women. Armadillos annoy archaeologists.

The Senate worked late on Wednesday to give $800 billion to banks and their friends, but it has ignored a bill to help the 800,000 unemployed workers that will lose benefits on Oct. 5.

Banks are still charging other banks high interest rates for loans. High interest rates are for risky borrowers–therefore banks consider other banks to be a high risk.