My brother

Messages

My new job, life in Mt. Carroll, and a visit to Chicago

March 10, 2009
David Wilkinson

what’s up?

I haven’t heard from you lately. How is life in Mt. Carroll? Are you cooking a lot more? Have you been back to Chicago recently? How is your car? How is the job? So many questions an so few chances to ask them.

Trading sucks right now, so I am in research mode AGAIN. Some day I will hit my stride with this stuff. The fam is good though and we are planning to go to Mexico in 2 weeks. I need a vacation really bad.

Your bro,
Dave

March 15, 2009
Hunter Hogan

Life in Mt. Carroll is pretty lame. I really like my job, though. I have a ton of responsibility, the cases are interesting, I am learned a lot, and I really am helping people. The job is great, but the social life is lame. I have not been back to Chicago yet because I have worked at least one day every weekend. Plus, I have been trying to get settled here. I didn’t have internet for three weeks, and I only yesterday got T-Mobile to release my from the contract so I can get new cell phone service. Ah, the adventures of country living.

There are six restaurants in Mt. Carroll: DQ, a “steak” place, an “Italian” place, a bar with a grill, the cafe we ate at, and a combination Subway and pizza place. I have been cooking more, and I have been eating a lot of cereal. There is a place called Buck’s Barn that is not bad. It is about 25 minutes away, but the food is decent and the prices are good. The other “nice” restaurant is called Poopies. Seriously, one of the best places to eat in Carroll County is named after dung. The first page of their menu is an homage to the versatility of the word shit. And it is a semi-famous biker bar and tattoo parlor that attracts people from all over the country.

The car is great. I still can’t believe I have such a nice car. Although I only drive it three times a week.

Where are you going in Mexico? How long will you be gone?

[Sixteen days later . . . ]

March 31, 2009
David Wilkinson

We went to the Iberostar Paraiso Del Mar in Riviera Maya(15 mi. south of Cancun). We were there for 7 days, it was really nice. One of the entertainers is the Mexican Hunter Hogan. He really reminded me of you. We just got back last night. I hope to post some pics this week.

April 2, 2009
Hunter Hogan

:)

I am going to Chicago April 10-12. Will you guys be in town?

April 9, 2009
David Wilkinson

We will be in town. Do you plan on stopping by? Give me a little notice so I can tell you what is going on. I think our schedule is pretty open, except for Easter of course. I am making my own horseradish this year, wish me luck.

[Note: the drive from Mt. Carroll to my brother’s house takes approximately three hours.]

April 10, 2009
Hunter Hogan

Hey, I will be driving to Chicago soon. I will call you in a bit. My plan is to spend the afternoon with you guys, and dinner if you like. Then go to [removed] house tonight. Museums and funs stuff tomorrow, shopping in the evening, and drive home Sunday morning or around noon.

April 12, 2009
Hunter Hogan

Overheard in New York | Nothing Beats Sashimi, Though.
Eavesdropping on strangers since 2003

[Note: I did not hear from my brother or see my brother that weekend.]

April 13, 2009
David Wilkinson

I guess I found out a little late, huh?


December 19, 2009
Hunter Hogan

Quick cook

The Straight Dope: Are barbecue grills fueled by newsprint dangerous?
“You’re probably familiar with those grills for backyard barbecuing that run on crumpled newsprint, and can probably know whether the lead in printer’s ink gets in the food being cooked, right?”


My brother wishes me a happy birthday and offers me lunch

[Note: My birthday is June 2.]

June 4, 2012
David Wilkinson

Back to Chicago
Happy Birthday Bro! Tried to call, but no answer.

June 4, 2012
David Wilkinson

Really hope you are O.K. Give me a call if you’re up for it.

June 4, 2012
Hunter Hogan

I’m not even close to ok. This is easily the worst time of my life. I don’t turn my phone on because 98% of the calls are from creditors and it is just depressing.

June 4, 2012
David Wilkinson

I’m very sorry to hear that. I’m working in Evanston now any chance of getting together for lunch or something? Where are you living? you working at all?

June 4, 2012
Hunter Hogan

I’ve been homeless since August, 2011. I’ve been lucky that I have been able to stay with a few different friends, sometimes for long stretches. When I haven’t stayed with friends, I have been able to shower and do laundry at some friend’s place. But in the last two months, circumstances changed for all of those friends. A couple of them moved, for example. So, I live in my car. I still have not figured out a long term plan for showering and laundry, but at least I got to do both yesterday. Of course I am not working. About a year ago, I accepted a temporary job doing legal work. The paperwork for the job included the question, “are you under investigation by the ARDC?” I said yes, they revoked their offer. They didn’t even know the nature of the investigation, and I hadn’t even been charged yet–it was still just an investigation. Who is going to hire someone accused of being a pedophile? A law firm? A restaurant that has customers who bring their families? If an employer believe I might be a pedophile, could they trust me with anything? In their mind, if I am willing to rape children, what would prevent me from stealing their tools or trying to kill them and take their money? If the employer doesn’t think I am a pedophile, and they hire me, and the employer’s customers or other employees find out, what will happen? What if one (or more) of the other employees thinks I am a pedophile? What if one or more of the customers believes it? A smart employer will consider this issues before they hire me–and they won’t hire me. But let’s say that they do hire me. Eventually, the issue will come up and the employer will have to decide what to do. What moron would choose to keep me as an employee and risk alienating other employees and/or the customers? No, I am not working.

June 5, 2012
David Wilkinson

That makes me sad. Not only the fact that you are homeless, but that you are homeless right by me and I feel powerless. I’m not saying move in, but at least let me help in ways that i’m able.

Two questions come to mind. First, do YOU think you are a pediphile? Second, is your case a criminal case or just a case to figure out whether or not you can practice law in Illinois? I know either is brutal, but just trying to understand better. I think if you either did like volunteer work, job at Panera, or something else that you deem in significant right now it would help you immensely.

Do you feel like coming to Evanston for a free lunch?

June 5, 2012
Hunter Hogan

I’m not a pedophile. And the broader issue is: do I coerce people, use undue influence, deceive people, or abuse any power or advantages I might have to force other people to do something they do not want to do? No, I do not do that. I am not a rapist. I do not abuse my power. I do not coerce. Panera is not going to hire me. First, they would be stupid to hire someone with my breadth and depth of experience and my level of education. Generally speaking, someone with my background is not going to stay there very long because I will leave as soon as I find a better job. Second, at Panera, I would interact with the public and with other employees. Both of which will include women that are 17 or 19 years old. The ethical charges are that I manipulated these two women. The accusations are untrue, but that doesn’t matter. From Panera’s perspective, if they hired me, and if someone accused me of similar behavior while working at Panera, then Panera would get sued and have a massive public relations nightmare. Wire a 37-year-old, over-educated homeless man that could be a lawsuit risk, when you can hire a high-school kid who needs a summer job? If my case were a criminal case, I would already be in jail, being held on bond and being raped in the ass.

No, I don’t want a free lunch. You have offered a few times, and–emotionally–I knew I did not want to accept, but I was unable to figure out a rational reason why I didn’t want to accept. Last night, however, I figured it out. A full explanation would be impossible because you didn’t even know if there were criminal charges or not, so that is a good illustration of how little you know about my life right now. So I have to use an analogy because trying to explain things using the facts of my life won’t make any sense to you.

I didn’t think of an analogy last night. And I am making up this analogy as I type. Therefore, it is going to be a pretty stupid in some ways, but I promise that even though it is absurd, it is VERY accurate.

Imagine you are sailing a boat on Lake Michigan. It’s not a super fancy yacht. But it is not a 2-person floating piece of wood. It’s a comfortable sailboat with everything you need to enjoy a week of sailing without having to go into port. You are in the middle of Lake Michigan, far from shore, and there are no other boats that you can see. Unexpectedly, you see me in the water. I don’t have a boat or a life vest or anything to keep me afloat. I have a small bag of food, but that is basically it. I’m not swimming to some place or from some place; I am just trying not to drown. You offer me the opportunity to come on board, talk, eat lunch, and then get back in the water.

Can you understand why I might be a little hurt by this offer?

“I’m not saying move in, but at least let me help in ways that i’m able.”

Nice boat. Keep the lunch.

June 5, 2012
David Wilkinson

First, I understood it was not a criminal case, but just wanted to be sure. You have become quite talented at not communicating. Given that you don’t communicate with me, it would be difficult for me to know what the hell is going on with your case.

Second, I think you are limiting yourself and I’m not sure why. Is it a cop out, feeling sorry for yourself, or just the depression thoughts telling you that you are worth nothing??? If illegal mexicans, polish and others can find employment I’m quite sure, with your resourcefulness, you could find some way to make, at least, a living. As for why anyone would give you a chance, I think you very much underestimate human compassion and a general willingness to give someone a second chance.

I think you should not worry about what an employers liability would be, but what would make you happy and able to survive long enough to get back in the game at the level you are capable of.

I was offering lunch as a non-commital(for you) way of seeing you. In the recent past you communicate very differently in person than otherwise. The only way I can really know what wavelength you are on or what trouble you’re in is to talk to you.

I would like to see you happy…..period. I do not live alone and need to consider the rest of the family about any decision. If you needed a place to stay and came to US and asked, I would hope Sandy would come through. There would be stipulations, but I don’t picture her saying gtfo.

I’d like to give you an analagy too. Imagine if you have a boat and suspect another boater is in trouble, possibly sinking. Not only have you received no S.O.S signal, but your repeated inquiries were met with radio silence. How do you know what’s happening? Lunch was my attempt to find out. I can’t exactly find you and knock on your door as I’ve done in the past.

I love you and wish for nothing but the best. I hope that you can love yourself enough for the best to come out. It may be different than you pictured it, but better than you ever imagined.

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